with all seriousness
i’ll just leave this right here…
& you can read the whole thing right here
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING
So I’m sure you recognize this as one of the epic moments from “The Prince of Egypt” where we see the super majestic whale as they cross through the Red Sea. However I noticed just one little issue: whale tales don’t move from side to side, they move up and down. And then it hit me, that’s not a whale. That’s not a whale. It’s a motherfucking SHARK. A BIG ASS MEGALODONIAN SHARK. WAITING IN THE WATER TO EAT THE PHARAOH’S SOLDIERS. Goddamn, Dreamworks.
Today is the 10th Anniversary of the this magical moment
some people don’t physically express emotions very well!
this means they look serious a lot of the time/don’t smile much!
it does not mean:
- they don’t like you
- they aren’t happy
- they are depressed
- something is “wrong” with them
please don’t mock them for it or insist that they “NEED TO SMILE!!!” or assume that they must be mad at you!!
we’re perfectly fine we just don’t look like it!! stop making fun of us!! thank you!!!!!!!
So uh, I haven’t seen this on my dash, but check out this kickstarter!
They’re waterballoons that SELF TIE, make a HUNDRED at a time, AND AND they’re biodegradablee!! Seriously why isn’t this all over my dash yet??
They’ve already reached WAY over their goal, but you can still get some early bird deliveries for an early start of the water balloon madness!
why the fuck would I ever need this many water balloons, I am a grown ass man
A grown ass man who I’m about to dump 100 water balloons on.